When You Pretend to Know, Everyone Loses | Empowered Educator

A teacher is losing control of their class but stays silent, worried about looking weak. Imagine if instead they asked, “Can someone watch me teach and give me feedback?” That one moment could shift the entire school culture.

Somewhere along the way, many of us absorbed a harmful belief: “If I need help, I’m failing.” Instead of asking, we overcompensate and hide our questions. We even nod when we’re unclear. We stay quiet rather than admit we’re at capacity.

Our Dilemma:

Stay silent and protect our image? Or choose to be vulnerable and get better? Ironically, this avoidance chips away at the trust we strive to establish.

The Truth:

Strong teams are built on interdependence. Asking for help is a strength and creates a resilient team through clarity, courage, and collaboration. And the leader has to go first.

The Payoff:

It’s an intentional, impactful move from “I have to know” to “This is a chance to learn with others.” One slight mindset shift opens the door to honest conversations, creative solutions, and growth.

📌 Thought Spark:

What would shift in your school if it were safe to say “I don’t know yet” or “I need help”? Resilient teams are grown through clarity, courage, and collaboration, and it starts at the top.

TryThis: 2 Vulnerability Power Moves

1. Model Asking for Help

“I could use a thought partner. Can I run this by you?” This normalizes learning out loud.

2. Reward the Ask

When someone brings a question or concern, respond with: “Thanks for bringing this up. I’m not sure. Let’s think it through together.” This affirms that honesty is valued here.

Your Turn: 

Think about one challenge you're holding solo. What would it look like to invite someone in this week?