When your top performer quits without a word… | Mindshift Moments

The Moment:

You’re staring at their resignation email thinking, “Wait…what?” They were your go-to. They hit deadlines. They never complained. You assumed they were fine - great, even. But now they’re leaving, and you're blindsided. You wonder, “Did I miss the signs? Why didn’t they say something? How many other people feel this way and aren’t saying it either?”

 

The Mindshift:

Top performers rarely make a dramatic exit. They don’t storm out with slamming doors or fiery emails. They leave quietly - after months of feeling unseen, under-challenged, or like their voice doesn’t matter. They slowly fade while smiling in meetings and delivering results. And when they finally walk out, they often leave without ever saying why.

Not because they didn’t care, but because they didn’t believe anything would change if they spoke up. Gallup reports that 52% of employees who quit said their manager could have done something to prevent it but most of them never had a meaningful conversation before leaving.

The painful truth? You may be spending your energy on your squeaky wheels - your underperformers, your conflict-creators, your top complainers - while your highest performers are self-managing, self-silencing, and slowly checking out.

We think silence means things are fine. Sometimes we’re even grateful for it…one less fire to put out, one less person needing our time. But silence is a signal. And if you ignore it, it becomes a goodbye.

 


The Strategies:

The good news? You can get ahead of this with a few intentional strategies.

1. Ask the Unexpected: 

Your best people don’t need micromanaging, but they do need meaningful investment. Make sure your time, money, and coaching energy isn't disproportionately spent on fixing underperformance at the expense of nurturing your top performers. Ask yourself:

  • What am I doing to keep them challenged and learning?
  • Do I know what they want to do next?
  • Am I explicitly naming their strengths and matching projects and opportunities to them?
  • Am I giving them 51% of the vote (at least) on the projects they own?

Great performers want to grow. If they can’t do it with you, they’ll do it somewhere else. But this doesn’t all have to fall on your to do list. Invite them into the design.

Try:

  • “I’ve noticed you have an incredible talent for <research and analysis>. What kind of project would let you lean into that more?”
  • “What’s a challenge you’ve been dying to take on, something that would stretch you in all the best ways?”

Your top performers don’t need a perfect plan. They need a leader who sees them, values them, and is willing to ask.

 

2. Make Feedback a Cultural Habit,  Not a Crisis Response;

Create a regular rhythm of asking your team for their honest perspective, especially your top performers. Don’t wait for performance reviews or exit interviews. Ask brave questions in calm moments, not just after a crisis. You could ask one powerful question during your one-on-ones or take a different person to coffee each month and explore two or three.

Here are some questions to pull from:

  • What’s something that’s felt frustrating lately but you haven’t brought up?
  • What would make your work here more fulfilling right now?
  • What’s one thing I could do differently to support you better?
  • What’s something you wish we were talking about as a team, but we’re not?
  • If you ever felt like leaving, what would be the reason?

You can also do quick monthly pulse checks. Ask people to color-code how they’re feeling:

  • Red = Something’s off
  • Yellow = Coasting or uncertain
  • Green = Energized and committed

Then follow up with: "What would move you closer to green?"

Whatever method you use, the real power is in the follow-up. Not in making every change someone suggests, but in how you respond.  A simple, “Thank you for sharing your perspective,” is often what builds the safety for people to be honest again next time.

You don’t need to act on every piece of feedback. Instead, look for patterns. "What are you hearing consistently? What are you starting to notice over time?" And if you do spot something worth exploring, you don’t have to carry the next step alone.

Try follow-up questions like:

  • What’s one meaningful step we could take in the direction you’re hoping for?
  • If we could make one change that would make a difference for you, what might it be?
  • What’s something that would feel like forward motion from your perspective?
  • What feels like the most important next step?

Silence isn’t nothing. It’s a signal. Miss it, and you don’t just lose a top performer. You lose trust, momentum, and the chance to solve something before it becomes a resignation letter.

When you create space for real conversations and respond with intention, you build a culture people want to stay in. One with high engagement, deep connection, and the kind of energy you can’t mandate, only invite. And a team that’s all in.

 
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